| | Wow...it has really been a while since I've done a real, thoughtful
update. I looked at all my posts that I've made, and it has come
to my attention that I come off as one whiney, emo SOB. Lol,
however true that may or may not be in real life, I use this journal,
esspecially in the last year or so, to put in some of my most stupid,
whiney thoughts as opposed to yelling them outloud. But yeah...
This year has been interesting. I've changed a bit. I feel
like I could be doing better in school than I should be. My
grades have suffered due to distractions, attitude, feelings, and
work. I need to be doing better, but it makes me pissed at myself
for doing so poorly. Which is why when I finish this up I'm going
to take a nap so I can get some real work done.
I'm in a relationship now. With who I think is the most beautiful
girl on this Earth. It makes me happy...and yet I know there
could be so much more to this if only she would...what? I'm not
sure, but all I can do is be the best man for her that I can be, be
there for her whenever she needs me, and when she feels comfortable
with making this more than a relationship by title, then I will be
ready for it.
I need to sell my computer so I can pay some folks off. I would
love nothing more than to keep Largo, but she has to go. If I
dont get rid of her on campus by the end of this week, I'm going to put
her up for sale on the internet.
Christmas is coming. In reading my past entries, I am remembered
by how I stood at the end of the year, how each Christmas was.
This Christmas I am uncertain, at least for now. I am uncertain
with what I want to make of myself, with the kind of person I want to
become. I am certain of a great many things, but with what do
with myself and my life as far as education goes and career goes, I am
uncertain. Certainly it feeds on me and is one of the excuses I
use for my suffering grades.
Alyx told me that she is turning 20, just like I will a month later,
and that because of that, she needs to act like it. I have to
agree...I need to start acting like I'm 20 with a future to
secure. I cannot reap the benefits of labor if I do nothing in my
youth. I need to get my butt in gear.
The longest post in a while. :)
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| | Posted 12/6/2006 7:08 PM - 2 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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